Dear Ms. RainyKate,
You gave me a bad grade, and I can't talk to you in person about it because I have other things to do. I didn't think I would get a bad grade, but I didn't think I would get a good grade either, even though I am an A student and made A's in high school. I did the assignment, even though I didn't focus, or use a thesis or anything; if you'd read my title, you'd see my main point, and I used lots of statistics and stuff, even though I wasn't supposed to use sources. And I only did bad because everybody was being loud, and you were yelling all the time at people, and I couldn't concentrate. I'm not blaming you, but I had to answer the grammar questions of people around me, even though I was supposed to be working, and not talking, but helping people doesn't make me part of the problem, and they were bothering me, so how else was I supposed to make 'em stop except to help them. Its not like I could say no to them or nothing.
Anyway, can I rewrite my paper?
Failing Student
Dear Failing Student:
Let me remind you that you earn grades; I don't just "give" them to you. Oh yeah, and all the yelling I was doing? I'm sure you mean, "Giving students instructions that were necessary to completing the paper" and "Asking one guy to turn off his cell phone" and "Trying to make all the goddamn yapping stop." But even if you don't, here's a hint: I DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR YOU! I know that's a shocker, but your pathetic little blame game, (despite the fact that you claim not to be blaming anyone) doesn't work with me. Life Sucks; get over it. You want people to leave you alone? Tell them to! There's another shock. If you don't let people walk all over you, they can't! OOOOO, I'm full of wisdom today. Oh, and you know what, when I bombed my history midterm my junior year because I made out with a boy all night the night before the test, I did not go blaming my teacher. I had my damn cry, and worked my ass off to make a 99 or 100 on every other assignment, including the final. It only got me a B, but damn, I was proud of that B. And here's a secret: that B did not stop me from succeeding. WOW! So how's about you suck it up, admit that you ignored all my comments on your rough draft, and make an A on the next paper.
Ugh,
Ms. RK
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6 comments:
holy crap? can you WRITE that?! can i teach where you teach? my god!! i want to kiss your feet.
this is amy, leslie's friend, by the way ;)
One of my running gags is that I write unsent letters to students.
siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh ;) this girl could use someone telling her the truth ;)
Hi! Just found the blog and I'm enamored.
I had to share this: I had a student hand me in a final draft of his second essay today. Now, this draft is about 2 weeks late and I had to remind him that he hadn't done it. When he handed me the essay, I immediately noticed some markings on it. Further inspection revealed that those markings were from the peer workshop he'd done with his first draft.
I'm making this a longer story than it needs to be. After much prodding, he handed me his final draft which was really his first draft with some handwritten comments on it and then asked me if that would affect his grade at all. Mind you I give them a rubric with every freaking essay and each one accounts for revision.
Translation of his comments: "I'm an architecture major and I don't need English."
Further translation: "I don't give a shit."
Meaghan,
Welcome!
The students who don't give a shit drive me nuts.
I'd like to tell them, "Fine. When your boss thinks you're stupid because you can't compose an email, write a memo or just plain communicate effectively, don't blame me. Just remember that you didn't need English."
Madam, I adore you. You rock and your stories just made my long day much more bearable.
Duncan
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